To my peach...

A lot is going on right now. I'm trying my best to keep myself busy and not think about it, but that can only get me so far. The life of a mortal surrounded by mortals is just awful.

I wish I could go back to when I knew we would be together for an eternity. Years were just flashes in the pan to us; seasons flew with each breath. It felt like you could run off into the wilderness, laughing while the summer sun beat down on your fur, and by the time I'd caught up to you and pinned you down, the first snowflake of winter could land on one of my ears and make them twitch. Even still, though, it felt like that eternity wasn't enough. I clung to you every moment I could, dreaded when you would leave; a fear of abandonment settling in each time you'd turn your back, even for just a moment.

If nothing else, I suppose that's proof that I'll never get enough of you. Even an eternity by your side left me yearning for more.

It's your birthday today, Sunshine!!! I mean, you'd know that, already, obviously, but it's just so exciting! This is the first birthday of yours we've celebrated as a couple! (Did you know that the mortals hold a whole festival in your honor on your birthday? I won't say you don't deserve it, but don't let their admiration get to your head... Only teasing, of course!)

Unfortunately, I have been very busy lately! Preparing for another semester of college... I stayed up late last night, out of necessity, so I also slept in a bit, but that didn't stop me from doing special things today! I updated your shrine on waifu.ist, first of all; linked back to the Neocities version, so more people can see my love letters. (Hosting these on that website feels odd, somehow.) I also had a peach-flavored sweet treat... Fresh peach ice-cream! It's obvious, but anything that tastes of peaches reminds me of you, and makes me feel nostalgic... I thought about you and our relationship the whole time I ate, and listened to songs I associated with you. (A sort of meditation, almost?) It was very relaxing. I also took time to rewatch your scenes in the show, and doodled you a lot!

Living has been a pain lately. More physically than anything, and, as said, I was very busy. But going easy on myself today in your honor and spending time with you has been a great breath of relief. Still keeping me grounded and calm, even now... I don't know what I did to deserve you. Happy birthday, my love.

Today, I found a love song which was sung by a man that sounded so much like you that my heart nearly stopped. I had to look up if your voice provider in the show and the singer in the song were the same. They weren't, but goodness, the resemblance was striking. I ended up searching for the song, as where I found it was a clip on Twitter; a part of an outtake from 'Get This Right'. From Frozen 2, of all things.

Well, while I sure do feel silly listening over and over to an outtake from a Frozen movie, it makes me feel cozy and at home. Like I'm curled up and cuddling you again, rubbing my face in your fur as you hum or sing quietly to yourself.

I've always loved your voice, Sunlight. All the time, of course, but especially the small little bits at a time I would hear you sing. If you weren't so plagued with stage fright, I like to think you would sing me to sleep with that rich voice that always reminded me of honey in a way I could never quite put into words.

It was your birthday a couple of days ago, my love!! Heartbreakingly, though, I was quite busy that day, despite my best efforts to keep it free. Life gets in the way sometimes... I apologize.

That said, I took every moment of free time I could to, in some way, spend time with you. I meditated with you in mind while listening to your playlist, and had you on my mind the whole day!

I haven't been writing you often, Peaches, and that is because lately I've gotten a diary, which largely functions as a place to write about similar things. That said, though, writing to you is comforting in a way which writing to nobody and everybody in my diary is. You're very familiar, and soft and gentle, and it makes me want to lean into you and let out a breath, and all the tension which I hold in my shoulders from living this human life.

I hope that you find yourself well, Sunlight. To another year of our eternal love.

Lately, I've taken to imagining you by my side whenever I need something done for myself. Not you when you're being a lazy pain in my ass (affectionate), but when you actually need my help. Stuff like brushing my teeth, and making food, mainly. Sometimes college work. It's made it a bit easier to go through my day-to-day.

I sort of want to redo your shrine. I wanna make it flashier, more indicative of my coding skills now, as it was one of the first shrines I ever coded. I have multiple other shrines that are works in progress, though, so I feel like I should hold off... But it's not my fault that I wanna prioritize you first!

It's been a while since I've written to you, sunlight, but you were on my mind as I watched the solar eclipse. I'm grateful that I live in a place where I could watch the entirety of it.

Please don't think that my lack of writing to you as often has anything to do with any waning affection. I suppose I just have less to write to you about, given that I've begun to keep a diary for myself. But that doesn't mean that you are on my mind any less. My lunar heart is just as full.

Even if the sun and the moon are only ever able to meet each other to dance so rarely, they always come back together. No matter how long they are separated. I'll return to you, always. My sunlight, my Peaches, my love.